Tiger Parenting: Is it good or Bad?
‘Tiger Parenting’ term was coined by Chinese professor Amy Chua in 2011 in her book ‘Battle Hymns of the Tiger Mother’. Tiger parenting includes being harsh on children as well as providing warmth to them. The question remains whether tiger parenting is good or bad...
While describing tiger parenting, Amy described how she demanded perfection from her daughters in everything they do. She even asked her four-year daughter to remake her birthday greeting card because it didn’t meet her standards! Everyone felt it was a bit too much...
In the name of making children excel at everything, we put children under a lot of pressure. We demand too many things from them.
Do your homework.
Eat your food.
Brush your teeth.
Go for a bath.
Don’t play in the sun.
Don’t watch too much TV.
Do this and Don’t do that!!!
Some demands are justified. Some are not? Where do you cross the line?
Sometimes we should let them be!
Tiger parenting means drawing a fine balance between being authoritative and being supportive. Authoritative parenting has negative connotations where parents are very strict with their children. In the name of discipline, they yell at children, even beat them. There is a fine line between yelling andasking children to do something in an authoritative voice...Beating them is out of the question.
Never ever raise a hand on a child...
Accidentally I did that once when I was very disturbed. My daughter wrote in her homework she felt very bad when I beat her. She remembered the only incident….
Children don’t understand the importance of many things as much as we do. They need to be told again and again. It needs a lot of patience to make children follow us. They say children follow you. If you sit with them to study, they will study as well (mostly). It is not possible to do every little thing that a child does. We need our own time. While spending quality time with children, we can definitely do any one task daily with children.
Tiger parenting involves standing up for children when they need it. Giving them warmth and showering affection is a must. Otherwise, your authoritarian voice fails. Children start rebelling for everything as they grow up.
In Chinese and Asian societies, tiger parenting is widely followed. They expect academic success from children to an extreme extent. They want to develop children in all spheres. They have a narrow definition of success which means academic excellence. However, pushing children too much against their will does greater harm than good. Stress for constant study gives rise to suicidal tendencies which are bad.
Tiger parenting is good when you discipline your child to do everyday tasks and inculcate good values in them by being strict.
Tiger parenting is bad when you demand perfection in everything, demand academic excellence and demand them to follow your orders.
In the end, there is no unique formula for effective parenting. We give birth to a child to see our own self grow, to shower our selfless love.
Providing our own child love and warmth is our responsibility!
Tiger parenting can be good or bad. And tiger parenting or any other parenting style is there just for study.
Your own relationship with your child matters a lot!